Littleness and Taking it One Step at a Time

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day's own trouble be sufficient for the day." ~Matt 6:34

"I need my Jesus time." It was nine pm on the Friday of Spring Break. I grabbed the car keys and drove the silent ten minutes to Church, toting along my prayer books. Down the large empty aisle to the very front, my beautiful Jesus sat. I was tired and it had been a long day of cleaning rooms, folding laundry, picking up smelly shoes, making dinner, and taking care of little siblings. I knelt down and gazed. "Hi, Jesus."

I read my Bible passage for the night but struggled to focus...I was very preoccupied with thoughts of the future: "What should my major be? What will life after college look like? Who, if anyone, is my future spouse? Maybe I should switch majors. Maybe I should reconsider what I'm doing with my life. Maybe I'm not even called to marriage."

"Or maybe you should just sit here with Me. This is where you are, and this is where you are meant to be."

The present. That is where we are called to be. Trust is not knowing exactly what your entire life plan is going to be, it's knowing that you are with God in this present moment. So, abandon yourself to God; He loves you so tenderly. Be His greatly loved little one.

There's a quote from Saint Faustina that goes,  "O My God. When I look into the future, I am frightened, But why plunge into the future? Only the present moment is precious to me, As the future may never enter my soul at all. It is no longer in my power to change, correct, or add to the past; For neither sages nor prophets could do that. And so, what the past has embraced I must entrust to God. O present moment, you belong to me, whole and entire. I desire to use you as best I can. And although I am weak and small, You grant me the grace of Your omnipotence. And so, trusting in your mercy, I walk through life like a little child, offering You each day this heart Burning with love for Your greater Glory."

It is only when we realize how little and how incredibly loved we are that we can place our trust in God and take life one day at a time. We are called to place our tiny little hand in His gentle, pierced, and life-giving Hand, and walk with HIm on the beautiful adventure which He wishes to lead us. Yes, there are twists and turns that mess with our plans, but that allows us to come again to God and realize our littleness, and the beauty of His plan. Otherwise, we quickly start building castles in the clouds, develop anxiety about the future as well as regrets about the past, and that, my friends, is most certainly not the road. If we are always worrying about what the path ahead looks like or what a mess we feel we have left behind, we are never going to appreciate the beauty of the steps we are taking now. And it is in those steps we learn who God is, and who we are.

When your mind starts struggling with the past and future, realize God is standing right beside you in that present moment. That is where we find God. That is how we walk with confidence, not trusting in our own strength and knowledge of the future but knowing that we are held by Him who transcends all time.

Know that in the many ups and downs, and goodness even upside-downs, you are going through, God is there. The present is where time touches eternity, where we delve into our relationship with God. I pray that you all find peace and strength, that you sit in His gaze and soak in His love, as He walks with you today.