The Best Kind of Peer Pressure

I have a distinct memory of telling my mother during my senior year in high school how reassuring it was to come into college with faith. As I realized how lonely and disorienting it might be to come into a brand-new place with a bunch of people trying to make community in different places and different settings, I found myself at least resting in the fact I could walk into a chapel for Mass or Adoration and feel the comforting warmth of God. What I hadn’t realized before college, and upon reflection of the last four years has become quite clear, is what a massive impact the community that also worshipped in the chapel had on my life.

One of my first memories in college was at breakfast with my Catholic roommate and a young woman in our dorm we met on our way to the dining hall on our second day at UVA. Halfway through breakfast, my roommate saw she was wearing a cross necklace and asked her about it. She mentioned she was a devout Catholic, and the rest of breakfast consisted of the three of us talking about faith. It was here I realized that faith in college was not something people had to keep personal or just mention quietly in passing, but something upon which friendships and community could be built.

A highlight of my year at UVA has always been Holy Week. Not solely because of the implications for our faith, but also because of the community that was so apparent during that season. While Holy Week is marked by the incredible sacrifice of our Lord on the Cross, for the past three years it’s been marked by a joint experience of the Masses, the viewing of the Passion of the Christ, the early O-Hill dinner before the Easter Vigil Mass, as well as the famous milkshake party at the missionary house following the Vigil. Having never been to an Easter Vigil Mass, I was nervous my first year and hesitant to go, but my group of Catholic friends made me commit to going and experiencing it in all of its beauty. This is the best form of Christian friendship.
 
Over my time at UVA, I have seen attempts by Catholic Hoos to try to build community, both successful and unsuccessful. There were always fun events like T-Sup and Fireside Mass (as well as the excellent addition of the subsequent Cookout run), not to mention the sporting events (both intramural and going to games). Of course, there will be varying degrees of success at any social event designed to build community, but the biggest change I’ve seen in the last couple of years has been the recognition of many Catholics at UVA that oftentimes, they must make an intentional effort to build Catholic communities and friendships. 

What is so powerful or different about these friendships and communities than other ones on Grounds? I wonder about this often. What is the draw? (And perhaps, how do we embrace it even more?) Several Catholic men and I were at breakfast at O-Hill dining hall a couple of years ago, and before we ate, the fifteen of us stopped and prayed together for our meal. The dining hall was relatively quiet, so the prayer seemed to echo, and I’m sure we received some curious glances. For the younger guys though, or at least certainly for me, I was impressed that this was the standard. Not to simply pray before meals, but to encourage all the others seated, too, as well without any feeling of awkwardness or discomfort.

Similarly, this past summer, I was at a bonfire with a couple of Catholic UVA friends who just graduated. We heard an ambulance in the distance, and without missing a beat, we all started a Hail Mary. It was second nature and built into all of us, and even if it hadn’t been, one of us would’ve joined in and not found it odd at all. This is the difference in these incredible Catholic friendships and communities I’ve seen grow and been thankful to be a part of at UVA. It is the incredible feeling of not having to hide or downplay the foundation of one’s life but instead be encouraged to dive deeper into it all the more.